I really hate having my picture taken. It always makes me feel very self-conscious and insecure. When I see my photos,99% of the time the only thing that I notice are all of my different flaws. It makes me feel sad.
Today I needed a picture or two of myself for a project, so I had to force myself to take these.
One good thing, is that I've began trying to like myself more for who I am. For the real me. It takes acceptance, and a certain willingness to drop preconcieved ideas of beauty, which doesn't come easy. I'm never going to be taller than five feet tall. My body always goes right back to the very same weight as soon as I stop obsessively counting calories. And yes, I AM a 34 year old with LOTS of gray hair. (Who also happens to be allergic to a chemical called PPD, in 98% or hair dyes, even most organic ones!)
Buuuut....... the point is this: as I've come to terms with "This is me!", I've started to slowly get more comfortable in my own purple boots. I've always looked and acted and thought a bit different from most people, a little quirky. A quirkette. I'm getting more ok with that. Women, myself included, spend so much time worrying about the how we look to the world, but what matters the most in life and how you live it with those around you. (Your insides matter too of course, but we all already know that!)
Sure I'd love to be the best me that I can be, and I'm not in any way saying I should quit trying. What I'm purposely learning though, is to be a little more kind, a little more accepting, and a little more proud of good ole' goofy me. :)