Monday, August 27, 2007

An Epiphany, Not the Good Type



I've been growing my hair out recently and remembered today, a time in High School when I had long hair. It took a while, but once it was long enough, I put my hair into two braids and then twisted it up into the lamest Heidi-esq hairdo you have ever seen.

Back then, in High School, I realized that my hair was long after I pulled it forward over my shoulders and it reached down to my "chest". I remember that, thinking; "God, my hair goes all the way down to my boobs, it's long!"

So today, when I decided to check in and see how long my hair has gotten, I stood in front of our mirror to take a look. Naturally, it's pretty hard to crane around and look at how far down your back your hair goes, so I pulled it all forward once again, over my shoulders. While it definitely wasn't a bob, or a shoulder skimming blunt cut anymore, it just wasn't long. At least not long enough to reach my boobies. Why isn't my hair growing!?

Then it hit me...... my hair IS getting longer, but so are my boobs.

Getting older sucks.

7 comments:

Judy said...

Okay, this is somewhat gross, but funny nonetheless. We have a separate tub/shower, and the shower is frosted glass. I have been incorrectly convincing myself that my boobies were not saggy in the least (nah, 36DDs sagging after two babies? NEVER!) - and I found out after I leaned up against the shower glass and stepped back and saw...

...my boobie imprints were where my belly button should be (okay, not quite, but a lot closer than "normal"!).

So, Lauren, welcome to my world. Thank goodness for support bras!

sharon said...

i think every woman who reads your blog will be replying to this post, first of all because it is hilarious, but also because, sadly, we can all relate.

sigh.

Laura said...

Yep, I can relate as well. My boobs have swollen and sagged since Cara was born. I guess that's what happens with nursing. Mine truly are approaching my belly button and I'm still 10 years away from being 40! You know, that old saying that goes, you know you're old when your bust line meets your waistline...well, I'm not ready for that yet. Thank goodness for Lane Bryant because they are about the only place I can find supportive boulder holders in my size (and we won't even go THERE!). I enjoyed the post Lauren, knowing that I'm not alone.

Twins-Plus-1 said...

OK, I totally agree that the breasts are definitely not my best feature now. After successfully breastfeeding twins and then my 3rd kid, they have changed. However, on a different note, I love your hair in this pic; all wildlike. I really love how flirty it makes you look.

Lauren said...

You guys are amazing! So much forth coming information on the boobage. I loved all of your comments, thank you. See, this is EXACTLY what we need...a forum where woman can be honest. I think this is great, really.

Ok, now let's talk about another post-baby enemy. My stomach fat. What the heck happened!? The top half of my stomach is thankfully the same, but between my belly button and c-section scar, it's so round. I've been trying to eat much better lately and to go walking more. I know sit-ups alone won't fix it. Oh yeah, that's another thing...when I was pregnant, I went to water aerobics class nearly 5 times a week, even right up to the day I went into labor. My abs. were the best they had ever been I am guessing. Now, after the c-section, they are so weak and just..odd. When I try to do too many sit-ups or bend a strange way, I get an abdominal muscle charlie horse. Ouch! Anyone else?
Thanks again guys. It's great to learn all about your boobs.

Laura said...

Oh boy, dare we voyage into the land of post-baby stomachs? As you know, I've never been thin but before Caitlin, I wasn't too bad. Afterwards, I developed a little "pouch" between my belly button & hips. It bothered me some but not terribly and it was starting to go away right before I found out I was pregnant again, with Cara. Well post-Cara, the cute little "pouch" has turned into a noticeable roll. It makes sit-ups nearly impossible and like you said, painful. To me, it feels like PMS cramps. Not fun but gives me a good excuse not to have to go to the gym. I have started walking more too since we now live in a community with sidewalks. I know I need to do more but...how does one begin to reclaim a body that feels so grossly foreign?

Lauren said...

Laura!
Thanks for your honesty and I love your words "a body that feels so grossly foreign" as that describes it perfectly. Everyone hears that once you have kids, your body is changed forever, but you almost can't grasp it until you live through it. I was surprised that my rib cage got wider when I was pregnant and never really went back to my pre-pregnancy size of 34". Also, while not a big deal, my c-section scar is so foreign to me. One day I woke up and it was there...and so was Noah! It's like getting a tattoo you never asked for.

These are all well earned battle scars for good reason, huh?

I also think, while diet and exercise is 80% of getting back to your old self, 20% is genetics. I know people who don't look like they were pregnant two weeks later and others that take years to get back to normal. Everyone is different. Being healthy is good (I have a long way to go) but the current U.S. obsession to quickly get back to pre-pregnancy weight is taking so much focus off of the babies. I'm a nerd, I like sites like "Celebrity Baby Blog" and "Celebrity Mammas", and I will say a huge portion of the posts are on post-baby diets and workouts.

Thanks so much again for your input. By the way, how is Cara doing this week!? So very very glad she did well and everything is good!
xoxox