Monday, February 24, 2014

The Special Truth About Going Gray - A Little Pep Talk for my Silver Sisters

Oh you guys, as though being a human being on this judgmental planet isn't hard enough, then you go ahead and have this gray hair stuff! It can be hard, can't it? So so hard. I understand what you're going through though, I get what you're up against! And that's why I'm here today to talk about some of the emotions that might come up along the way with our gray, and to tell you, no, PROMISE you that in the end, IT'S GOING TO BE OK! In fact, better than OK! Really, trust me on this one. It all works out!

Whether you're battling your "sliver wisdom streaks" or if you have none at all, most of us at some point or another come up against a challenge or an obstacle or small bump in the road. Wouldn't it be great to find some inner-strength, a special bit of self-confidence that could help you dance through your day and up over your concerns? Well, guess what? YOU ALREADY HAVE IT, RIGHT THERE INSIDE OF YOU! Read along if you'd like some nourishment for your gray soul, and even if you don't have gray hair, read along too! These ideas can be applied to most any annoying little pocket of self-doubt.

Over the past two weeks I've heard from several women who have been having some painfully similar situations as they've decided to grow out their gray hair. Basically, other people have been offering up their unsolicited  advice, criticism and disapproval about their decision to go gray. What many family and friends and co-workers fail to realize is that often the choice to ditch the hair dye is not a choice at all! There are many men and women, myself included, who are forced to face the gray due to allergies to hair dye, money issues, or the conviction that covering your head in chemical dye is not a risk that you're willing to take. But choice or not, strongly negative comments when they are not requested are rarely helpful - they only cause self-doubt and a sense of sadness. It's not easy being gray!

Yes, discussion and debate is a healthy part of life, but the art of sensitivity and knowing when to say something and when not to, is perhaps even more valuable. And, besides, IT'S ONLY A HAIR COLOR!  Saving our desperate pleas and differences of opinions can usually do more good in times of serious matters, when people actually need your help.

I did my best to advise and to cheer these brave women in sticky situations on. They each had their own reasons for growing out their grays and each had a choir of co-workers, family or friends criticizing and questioning them in the background.

Ironically enough, I ran into my own bit of gray criticism this week, which luckily does not happen very often! I had noticed a spike in readers and became curious as to where they were visiting from. I rarely investigate my traffic sources, but once in a while it's fun to see if a larger website has picked up one of my posts, or if somebody has linked to How Bourgeois. It's exciting! This time I noticed a significant proportion of my daily readers coming from a bulletin board site for moms in a large, East Coast city.

I clicked on the traffic source (this bulletin board) and looked for How Bourgeois. Sure enough, someone had posted a link to my most read blog post to date - Seven Best Tips and Tricks for Successfully Growing Your Gray Hair Out!  As of now, more than 68,000 people have read this particular post! So, it's only to be expected that a whole slew of different opinions exist on this piece.

The women on the site that I visited were not trying to be mean. I really feel that way. In fact, many were being very kind, citing How Bourgeois as a point of gray inspiration (Thanks guys!). But, I don't have thick skin, and my heart was pounding with each sentence that I read. This is something you should  know about me: I might exalt the virtues of BEING YOU!, and I might promote confidence, but I'm just like anybody else, there are good days and bad, but most are full of self-doubting moments. I'm human! :)

One woman on this bulletin board mentioned that my gray hair might be OK right now because I look fairly young-ISH, but that: "I'm going to look like hell at 45."  

OUCH!

OK though, I get where she's coming from. Theoretically, the fear about graying is that it is our aging will be put up there on a public stage. (Whoa! Scary!) And, this woman is saying that as I become older, the gray, plus the additional age, in her opinion, won't be very complimentary to each other. Sure, I suppose time is not kind to some people, but man, I've seen some absolutely STUNNING white haired women in their 50's, 60's, 70's and much much older!
Beauty is not an age! Not at all. 

Also, I'm not so sure that in 8.5 short years from now, I will start to look like hell. I mean, (knock on wood) I HOPE that if I continue to moisturize and take care of myself, that I will look fairly similar to 36-year-old me when I'm 45. Nobody can look exactly the same nine years later, but HELL?

Another comment was from a woman who kindly said that I looked pretty with the gray, but that: "If I saw her in person, all I would want to do is yell out how much younger and prettier she would look with brown hair."  

Technically, some of this is correct. I think. I probably would look younger with my brown hair. Maybe? Or actually....maybe not! When I reached a point where I had been dying my hair for over ten years, it ended up being a very matte, lifeless shade of brown. Not much shine because it was so dry and damaged.

Here, you be the judge. Did I really look SO much younger when I had brown hair? And by the way, these pictures were taken about five or six years ago.


Before growing out my gray: 

Here I am with Noah. I was still dying my hair at this point. It left my hair frizzy and matte from the decade plus of hair dye.



Oh my gosh, WHAT is this horrid picture!? I must love you guys if I'm willing to share this one. I remember this photo being taken at the end of a long summer day of chasing a preschooler and the humidity doing a number on my hair. Gosh, and no makeup! Yikes! ;)
I had a hard time finding photos that really really showed my hair "before", so this is what I have for ya. Poor me, it was such a struggle at this point. I had stopped with the hair dye because of progressively worse allergic reactions and had began using henna. For me, no matter what I tried, the henna just made my gray hair a lighter shade of reddish-brown, and left me with a frizzy texture. (Henna is awesome stuff! Don't get me wrong. It's just not as awesome in desperation every three to four weeks for two years straight).

After growing out my gray:

And here I am now! A good five or six years later!  I don't think I look recognizably older. I think I  look a little less exhausted from chasing a tiny child around! The point being, gray hair does not have to just age you. It really doesn't!


In fact, it can actually transform you into a new and improved YOU! For example, having healthier un-dyed hair gave me a brand new texture. Softer, shinier and much less frizzy. Also, a little bounce and spring. SEE, this gray hair isn't hopeless! :)



My friends, here's the deal about all of the unsolicited advice and "input" that's going around. As difficult as it can be to listen to, as much as people's comments might make you feel hurt, the reality is that most people just can't picture your END PRODUCT.  

Heck! I couldn't even have imagined what my gray hair would look like once it was grown out! I was even worried about it myself! Could you or can you imagine exactly how you will look in the end!? Most likely not.  So when your co-workers gang up on you, or your family begs and pleads, know that part of this is their lack of IMAGINATION!  ;)

Then, you just go right ahead and tell them that this whole growing out your gray business is WAY more difficult on you than them, and Geez give a girl some support! Then show them a few "gray inspiration" boards on Pinterest. HERE, HERE or HERE so they can finally see just how nice a person's gray can look! That's part of the problem: we really don't have many white-haired role models in our media and popular culture. You can't blame people too much for not having good impressions of what white hair can be.

I really can't stress enough what a positive difference it can make to have your friends and family on board with you. It's everything. If you have a bunch of Negative Nellie's on your hands and growing out your hair is a must for you, I'd even go as far as to ask them to "fake it 'til you make it," by doing their best to hold back the negative comments until you've gotten through the difficult process. Then, once everything is said and done, if they don't like the way your hair looks, but you do.....well then, it's FINE! At least at that point you'll probably be more self assured and you will know if the whole gray thing is RIGHT for YOU! Who knows, your family and friends might even come to like your new look!

So, now that we've gotten the unsolicited advice part out of the way, let's talk about SOLICITED advice. A whole new animal.......

Women love approval. Stop asking for approval!

Approval is important to many women. I know it is for me! Whether a conscious desire or something that we seek out without even realizing it,  approval from those who we value the most is a very strong and important force.

For a few of us, other people's opinions truly don't weigh heavily, but for the rest, the whole approval situation is a big deal!

When I decided to stop using hair dye, I felt at first like I had to apologize to those around me, that I had to qualify what I was doing........

"I'm sorry Jon, I must look like an older lady." "Mom, do I look unkempt!?" And what must have been a steady stream of self-deprecation to my friends: "I look terrible!" "Am I embarrassing to be seen with?"

I would offer up long-winded explanations of "why" I chose to stop dying my hair to those who would listen. Heck, I would even qualify it to myself!

And then you know what happens?...........one day you just kind of get worn out from talking about it some much. Or, you might grow tired of the different comments and suggestions that the talking brings up. Hopefully also, right around that time, you're starting to kind of LIKE your gray hair! It has probably grown long enough at this point that you're getting out of that "skunk stripe" phase, or you're able to pull your hair back in cute clips, or it's just a neat color!

Then find your own little voice deep inside. It stops doubting and begins to say nicer things like: "You know, the gray is kind of ok!"  "This isn't SO bad."
And you realize that you really do not need other people's approval. Especially when it comes to a decision about your hair. Because, remember.......... it's just HAIR! ;)


And..........
I am who I am.


Acceptance is what you do for yourself. You don't need somebody else to do it for you.

Remember this. It'll save you some heartache. You just have to love yourself first, right!?

So that's what I have for you my silver sisters!  One of the most surprising things for me about this journey has been just how LITTLE it has to do with hair and how MUCH it's about the inner me!

Go forward in your day, in this white hair adventure, forward in your life, knowing that what matters much more than the color of our skin or the color of our HAIR, is the color of our HEARTS. You might think you've been sent down this path to grow your locks, but really what will grow even more is that little glow inside of you.

Be well my friends! Life is good!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,
Lauren 

83 comments :

Jenn said...

Lauren - You are my Gray Hair Hero. I cannot say this enough. Wonderful post. Yours was one of the first pages I came across when I made the decision to grow out my gray, and I am so grateful for your willingness to be so open and sharing with your own experiences. Thank you so much for putting yourself out there, even when it does leave you exposed to unkind (and unwarranted) criticism. You are beautiful, inside and out. :)

Valerie said...

Hi Lauren, I came across your blog recently, while searching for articles about going gray. I am 41 this week and do not dye my hair, I never have. I have silver streaks, but I love them. Your blog touched my heart. You are an inspiration! Thank you a million times for writing this post and all of the others. It is so true! I was on the fence about coloring my hair, which I have always left natural for several years. I have had such peace with the decision to go silver. You are so lovely. Hopefully my silver will look as beautiful as yours. Cheers! Thank you from a new follower! Valerie

Lauren said...

Dear Valerie,

Your comment has me sitting here smiling and tearing up. I'm so happy that you enjoyed this post. Your comment about having peace with your decision to go silver really resonates with me because that is exactly what I strive for....peace! Acceptance. So, thank YOU Valerie! :) I'm sire that your silvers are just gorgeous, and your heart too. Thank you from a new friend.
xoxo, Lauren

Pamela Caldwell said...

Hi Lauren you nailed it!! Great job Thank you for the effort to write this especially for the ones having a ruff time. Your so right it's not just about the hair it's the whole journey & how it takes you to different places.. Do not pay attention the negative people either I think you look younger & softer than with the dark hair. Besides it's not about how young we can look every minute we All are growing older can't look 30 for ever..In the beginning I thought let's do this then after the first month I thought Really? I am into my 9th month & I say yes really ...your right it does get easier. Keep doing what you love. Your Beautiful!!

Guatemama2000 said...

Lauren,

I know of no one whose inner & outer beauty shines more than yours! Sadly, I think so many women have bought into the marketing/societal perception of what "beauty" is that they can't see true beauty when it's in front of them.

I'm rocking my grey streaks and dreaming of the day I have more!

<3 you!
Valerie

Valerie said...

You are so welcome, I always hesitate to leave comments, I don't want to put my two sense where it doesn't belong! I admire all of your lovely, lovely pictures. You could be a model! You could not look bad in a million years, much less 8! Don't listen to anyone that says otherwise. Peace is a wonderful thing isn't it! Your blog has been an inspiration, I'll keep reading. It makes me smile. =) Your new friend, Valerie

Tiffany said...

Lauren,
Thank you! Before I found you on Pinterest I hadn't even considered just letting my hair go gray. Your hair is beautiful and I can only hope mine looks as good this time next year. When I look in the mirror and see that little gray stripe I'm excited. I can't thank you enough!

Lauren said...

Valerie, you are so very welcome to leave a comment with your two cents ANY time! I feel like there is so much that we can all learn from each other. :)
Thank you for your encouragement and cheer! I WISH I could be a model! I will try to hold the looks together the best I can for the next 8 years. Lol. ;)
Yes, Peace is wonderful. Thank you again for making me smile too!
Your new friend,
Lauren <3

Twins-Plus-1 said...

Lauren, my beautiful silver haired lady, you truly are one in a million. My life is forever changed for the better because you are a part of my world. You have this glow about you that radiates from the inside out. You amaze me with your positive spirit and genuine nature. XOXO

Sharon T said...

Hi Lauren, I too came across your blog while searching for information about going gray. I've been coloring my hair since I was 26 and at 44 I am now done with it! I'm so fortunate that my friends and family have all been supportive in my decision to finally go gray. I'm 2 months in now so have a substantial "skunk stripe" and have had strangers make offhand comments about it, but usually it just makes me laugh. I just tell myself that it's just hair and doesn't effect who I am. The naysayers can go...well, you know where! You're a lovely person, with lovely hair and that's all there is to it! And I can tell you, you won't look substantially different when you're 45, believe me! Thank you so much for this blog!

Julie said...

Hi Lauren, You are beautiful and such an inspiration to me and my my skunk look I have going right now. I am so at the "it's just hair!" phase. Possible easier at my 52 years than mid 30's. I think you look just as young with the gray as when you had brown hair....

Wendy said...

First let me say I am a new follower of your blog...I think you are just beautiful with your grey hair...and when you do hit 45 you will be even more beautiful...I am in the thinking about going grey stage at the moment...I have been dying my hair since my early 30's as the women in my family grey very early...I am at the point that I am just tired of having to dye my hair every couple of weeks and want to see what my hair looks like at this stage...I do know I have some great white hiding under there, so I am considering it for the summer...I have enjoyed looking through your blog and all the tips and advice that you give about going grey...thank you for having the courage to go grey...it works and in my humble opinion looks better than before...so much softer and your skin looks just beautiful...hope you have a great evening.

Regina said...

That was a wonderful article Lauren! You will look beautiful at 45! And your natural hairr is so much prettier than the dyed hair for sure! So people who were running off at the mouth are full of it and are just spewing hogwash! Thanks for being a beautiful inspiration to all who want to embrace their natural beauty.

DH Lewis said...

I stopped coloring my hair at age 50 and never looked back. I actually like the way I look with my silver hair BETTER than with color, or my natural blonde hair of my younger years. I am now 57 and I get way more attention now than ever, and it is all positive. I however am NOT looking for attention or approval. I just want to be natural and healthy!
DH Lewis

Ex-pat in Kuala Lumpur said...

I too have just recently come across your blog while I was looking for info on growing ones hair out. First, I must say, thank you for the inspiration. I have been steadily having my hair colored for the past 16 years. For the past 10 years I have wanted to grey to come in and my husband said he didn't care how much it cost, he wanted me to continue to color my hair. I just turned 60 in January and I decided after reading your blog it was time, I earned every one of these grey hairs. We are living in Malaysia right now (for 3 years) and it is not easy finding someone to do my hair the way I liked it. I wrote to my 3 grown daughters and told them what I was planning on doing, and all three said go for it...be bold! My husband came home from work and I told him...he finally said ok, just do it, he was tired of the arguing over it. YEA!!!. I went to this salon that I just started using for a hair cut. I told "Edwin" I wanted the grey to come in..It had already been 2 months of growth. The skunk look. lol He said maybe we could highlight the colored part blonde and not touch the white, that way it wouldn't be such a contrast. So we did that and it is not bad. I have short hair so he said it won't take as long as if it were long. I sent a picture to daughters and they thought it was great that I was a blonde/ Thank you for the courage! Cindy

Anonymous said...

I too have just recently come across your blog while I was looking for info on growing ones hair out. First, I must say, thank you for the inspiration. I have been steadily having my hair colored for the past 16 years. For the past 10 years I have wanted to grey to come in and my husband said he didn't care how much it cost, he wanted me to continue to color my hair. I just turned 60 in January and I decided after reading your blog it was time, I earned every one of these grey hairs. We are living in Malaysia right now (for 3 years) and it is not easy finding someone to do my hair the way I liked it. I wrote to my 3 grown daughters and told them what I was planning on doing, and all three said go for it...be bold! My husband came home from work and I told him...he finally said ok, just do it, he was tired of the arguing over it. YEA!!!. I went to this salon that I just started using for a hair cut. I told "Edwin" I wanted the grey to come in..It had already been 2 months of growth. The skunk look. lol He said maybe we could highlight the colored part blonde and not touch the white, that way it wouldn't be such a contrast. So we did that and it is not bad. I have short hair so he said it won't take as long as if it were long. I sent a picture to daughters and they thought it was great that I was a blonde/ Thank you for the courage! Cindy

Anonymous said...

Dear Lauren, I have been reading your blog for a couple of months now, since I decided to ditch the dye. I only lasted with the hair dye for a year, I had been quite silver at 40, and decided to give the colour a try. Like I said, I lasted a year. I am glad that I tried it, not so glad about the current growing out process though!

I completely agree that it is a lot more about your internal appearance, and not so much about your external appearance, it is only hair, like you say so well. It is quite fascinating to see people's reactions when they see your silver streaks coming back, let alone what they say when you actually admit to growing out your grey on purpose.

I really enjoy your blog, and I think we all look amazing with our silver hair, no matter what age we are. It is interesting that people's reactions to silver hair on women are very similar, wherever we are in the world, I read your blog from sunny Australia, the complete opposite to your Michegan winters, I can't even begin to imagine living with such weather!

Best wishes on your inspiring journey, please keep sharing, it is an absolute joy to read. :-)

Ali said...

Hi Lauren, I only recently found your blog, but it was the final piece of the jigsaw that I needed to be confident with my decision to go grey. My mum went grey at 16 and is still colouring her hair brown at 65. My mother in law who is also 65 colours her hair every two weeks to keep up with the grey. My sister went grey very early and also struggles to keep up with the colouring.
I have always felt that I wanted to go grey, that I don't want brown hair or the struggle to maintain colour when I am 65. But when my grey really started coming in a few years ago I became self conscious about it and felt too young to go grey. I have jet black hair naturally so the grey really is a contrast! So for the last 18 months I got some warmer highlights so that my grey would be less noticeable. But as my hair is so dark this involves bleaching and recolouring the hair. I miss my glossy healthy hair, even if it is partially grey.
My mum begs me to colour, thinking I am too young to go grey. I am 33 in March and just had my first baby. So it has now been 4 months since I had the highlights and colour put in. I am due a dye job!
My husband was also not supportive of me ditching the colour. But your posts helped me a lot to give it a try, and he is now on board after I repeated what you said - it's just hair and if I don't like how it looks with the grey when it grows out I can always go back to colouring. So he is on board with my lets wait and see attitude. I am excited about the idea of not dying my hair anymore and not wondering if people are looking at my roots. I have quite a bit of grey hair, I am tired of being ashamed of it. I didn't do anything wrong to end up with premature grey hair, it is just the genetic lottery! So I am tired of trying to hide it.

Anyway, this response is turning into an essay. I just wanted to say that your blog has given me the confidence to give this a go after contemplating greying naturally for at least 2 years. So I am going to stay away from the colour and see how it goes. I will let you know how it goes as I wouldn't have had the confidence to at least try it without this blog, basically I am trying to say thank you!

Lippyida said...

Absolutely wonderful blog here missis! I'm six, almost seven months into my grey-morphosis! I do have many strange looks, as I have a good crop of grey around my face and I'm rather a typical English rosey cheeked gal. I'm a wee bit older than you at 41, and I'm pleased I made the decision to embrace my grey now, instead of waiting until I'm in my 60's, because, I feel being that bit younger and not too wrinkly, I can take it and I'm totally going to rock my grey and show it off to all and sundry!!

Lauren said...

Hi Wendy, WELCOME!!!!

So glad that you're here. Thank you for the thoughtful and much-too-kind comment. :) I'm happy that this post could be a helpful for you!

Wendy, it sounds like we had similar "turning points". I too was tired of the repetitive dying when I decided to grow out my gray. (Actually, by that point I was on to henna and tired of the henna. Same issue!)
I say, especially because it sounds like you have some GORGEOUS white , that you just try it! You can always always go back to dye if you don't like your new look. There's no obligation! :)

Growing out your gray or white isn't easy, and most get discouraged at some point. I sure did! But, if you can stick it out, of wow, it's so incredibly rewarding! I only wish I had done it sooner and I hear a lot of women say the same.

So if you decided that growing your hair out this summer is right for you Wendy, know that I'm here cheering you on, and I'm always happy to answer any questions.

I think you'll look fab! Thank you again for your kindness and so nice to meet you!
xoxox,
Lauren :)

Lauren said...

Hi Wendy, WELCOME!!!!

So glad that you're here. Thank you for the thoughtful and much-too-kind comment. :) I'm happy that this post could be a helpful for you!

Wendy, it sounds like we had similar "turning points". I too was tired of the repetitive dying when I decided to grow out my gray. (Actually, by that point I was on to henna and tired of the henna. Same issue!)
I say, especially because it sounds like you have some GORGEOUS white , that you just try it! You can always always go back to dye if you don't like your new look. There's no obligation! :)

Growing out your gray or white isn't easy, and most get discouraged at some point. I sure did! But, if you can stick it out, of wow, it's so incredibly rewarding! I only wish I had done it sooner and I hear a lot of women say the same.

So if you decided that growing your hair out this summer is right for you Wendy, know that I'm here cheering you on, and I'm always happy to answer any questions.

I think you'll look fab! Thank you again for your kindness and so nice to meet you!
xoxox,
Lauren :)

Maureen said...

Hello Lauren- A very dear friend of mine (Heidi) sent me a link to your post. As she is well aware, I too am VERY white under all my dark brown dye. I started graying at the age of 15 or so and ever since at least every two weeks I color it. Costly and makes me feel more confident. However, I know that I am 98% or more 'white' today and always wondered what it would look like white. But I am terrified of the reactions, comments and especiallly not feeling attractive.

Now if there was a guarantee that I'd look as amazing as you, I would go white today!

So, how did you handle the grow out? Did you simply keep the same style and grow it out? Or did you go shorter? How long did it take actually?

Oh, so many questions! My husband Mike saw your blog as well and told me to 'Go for it!'. But how? I need a support buddy!!! So thank you to you for being courageous and Heidi for always being there for me for the past 39 years!!!!

Maureen

Loulou said...

My aunt just grew out her colour to reveal her grey. She doesn't live nearby so I didn't see her during the changing process but she recently posted some photos on FB of how the finished transformation looks. In all honesty, she looks quite a bit younger than she did with dyed hair. And the smile on her face spoke volumes about the freedom she feels from the perpetual skunk stripe.

And you Lauren, are a beauty, inside and out. Never in a million years will you look like hell. xo

Sharon T said...

Hi Lauren,
I posted yesterday, but I'm not sure if it didn't work or if I said something wrong? I found your blog when researching how to go gray and I love it. Thank you so much for breaking the stereotype and showing everyone that gray is just another hair color :) (Your hair is lovely by the way) People can be cruel, especially on the internet when they think there are no repercussions. Just keep doing what you are doing! You've made a difference for a lot of people! Sharon

Anonymous said...

Great post. I love this. Thanks for your inspiration. I'm on week 20 of no dye. Peace!

Pamela Caldwell said...

Hello Lauren you nailed it!!! Loved every word Good Job! Your so right it's so much more than just the hair. The ones who are going thru it & have done it know that for sure. I think those nay Sayers are not seeing you to well your hair looks Fantastic & as time goes on they will wish THEY could of did it.I think you look so much softer than before even being as young as you are. Keep doing what you love & Peace be with you!!

Katherine Carbo said...

Dear Lauren,

Having known you since our early 20's I can honestly say I think you look younger than you did in your 20's! Your eyes, your style, and your beautiful face and spirit have a unique sparkle today.
Love to you always,
Kathy

Autumn said...

Hi Lauren,
I am new to your blog! I happily found it while researching the decision to go gray. I am a newbie! Not much grown out yet, but am so grateful to have found such a positive blog and lots of support! Thanks for writing to us all.

~Sheryl said...

Hi Lauren!! As I was posting pics on my fb page of my hair coloring struggles the past two weeks, an old friend of mine posted something on my page that is perfect for sharing with you. What he said was this: some of us don't worry about the paint. It's the foundation that counts!

I think that sums up your post perfectly. Have a great day my friend... stay warm this week!!
~Sheryl

Lauren said...

Hi Sheryl! Oh my gosh, I absolutely LOVE your friend's saying. That is BRILLIANT! Thank you for sharing and for making me smile. I just love it. :)

You stay warm too. Have a great rest of the week!
xoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Anonymous said...

hi lauren, as a 22 year old i have had a lot of mixed opinions about growing my greys out(in the skunk stripe stage atm) and have had a lot of trouble trying to find inspiration and support for us younger women with grey hair online until i found your blog. i would just like to thank you for all the support & inspiration you have given me and all the tips for healthier looking hair. it has helped me through the transition ALOT! much love all the way from australia:) shannon xx

Lauren said...

Hi my new friend Shannon!!!!! xoxoxoxoxoxox
Oh I am sending you so much love and a hug. I remember being 22 with gray and that indeed is not easy! I hope things are going ok for you now. In the least, I bet your hair will be healthy and soft and shiny! I was surprised to find that there are truly A LOT of people in their 20's and 30's going gray. I imagine it must be hard sometimes, but know you're not alone! I'm way over here in the US cheering you on Shannon, ok! :)
Hang in there. So nice to meet you! xoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Anonymous said...

hi lauren, lovely to meet you too! i am hanging in thanks to people like you creating a community for us silver sisters. i forgot to mention, like the other ladies comments above, how beautiful (and younger) you look with grey hair and that i think it suits you way more than your dyed/coloured hair in previous photos. the only thing i need now is a hairdresser that is supportive as yours. cannot wait to try the transparent glaze (mentioned in a previous post) who would have thought there was such a thing? once again thank you and keep up the lovely work:)shannon xx

Lauren said...

Hey Shannon, thank you so much for your nice comment. I really appreciate it. <3 <3 <3

Yes! The clear glaze! It does WONDERS!!!! :)
I'm all for staying away from dyes and other harsh things while growing out your one's gray, BUT...honestly, the clear glaze every 3-4 months or so, it really helped make a difference.

Please don't give up on finding a supportive stylist. I really lucked out. What you could do if call around to salons that you are interested in and explain your situation and tell them that you are looking for someone who is understanding about women keeping their gray. I bet you will find a good match that way!

So much luck Shannon and thank you bunches again! xoxoxooxo, Lauren

Citronjaune68 said...

Hi Lauren,

Thank you for this new article about gray, I could understand a lot thanks the traductor ! You really don't have to regret your colored hair, it didn't look natural and your gray hair it's really you, thats why on every picture you shine, and grey highlights your beautiful blue eyes. Thank you so much; it gives me courage to continue my way to gray !
Raphaƫlle

Lauren said...

Hi there again Raphaelle! I'm so thankful for your nice comment. Thank you! :)
I'm happy that my post was helpful. Please don't give up. I want to follow along with your gray adventure too! Your silvers are beautiful! Remember that! :)

I hope you have lovely weekend!
xoxoxox,
Lauren

Daniel L.Phillips said...

Lauren- I follow most your images off Pinterest.. I think you are absolutely beautiful.. Women who criticise you are only voiceing an opinion base on their own life experience in their own times.. Women in their times were required to live by different standards then today,, Bless your family and I hope you stay as beautiful on the outside as you certainly are on the inside.. Daniel

Lauren said...

Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment Daniel. You have such an interesting point! Now that you mention it, I can imagine how much past societal dictates must come into play. Thank you for taking the time to stop by with such kind words and for making me think! Have a lovely week! Lauren

startingwritenow said...

Lauren, I am 43 and went gray this year, and have had more compliments than I ever thought I would. I love it, and I never thought I would. I can play with more eyeshadow colors than before, and rock a bright lipstick much better-who knew! Thanks for your pics and your blog, I am so glad I found it! (And the only one that complained? My mom, who said I made her feel old!)

Lauren said...

Hi Startingwritenow! (Great name, I love it!)

I'm so so so happy that you're enjoying your gray. That's fantastic! I know, isn't it fun having a whole new pallet of colors for make up and clothes? Enjoy! That's funny about your Mom. My Mother barely has any gray. I always find it funny and feel like I look like the Mom. Thanks for taking the time to write. So nice to meet you!!! xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

I am one week away from my "pixie cut" appointment to finally rid myself of this horrid, colored, two-toned hair. I am both excited and fearful! Going gray and short both at once seems like it will be a big shock. But I am re-reading your posts for inspiration and support and courage. Thanks for your words of encouragement to all of us who are going through it!! -Beth

Lauren said...

Hi there pixie-cut-to-be friend! Thank you so much for your nice comment. Yes! Going for a super short cut AND leaving the dye behind IS a big change and can be a shock! But, two pluses about getting the short hair cut..... (before I list the pluses, fyi: I don't think you HAVE to get a short cut, I'm kind of a do what you'd like gal!)..... back to the pixie.... two nice pluses is that #1. it kind of forces you to go with the gray. With long hair, it's easy to back slide and touch-up your roots, but when making a commitment like a short cut, you are kind of encouraged to also commit to the color. Plus, your gray to dyed hair color ratio is smaller so you can get a better idea of the "end product." It can be encouraging! Also, #2, you are left with mainly super healthy, un-touched hair, which can be very nice! My whole texture changed for the better once I stopped with the dye and the henna.
Just remember , it's all about attitude. :)
A short cut can be a huge shift, but if you look at it as an adventure, one where you can play with hair styles and cute clips or styling products....it can be fun.

So much luck to you! Thank you for stopping by!!! :)
xoxoxoxoxo

Tiffany said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for putting this out in the world. I, too, am 36 and about 60% gray at this point.

About 2 years ago, I decided to stop with the hair dye. It's expensive. It takes too long. It's chemicals that I don't need. It was frying my naturally curly (read: dry) hair. It was awful.

Since I've stopped and let the gray grow in, I get comments all the time. I'm a teacher - kids ask me why my hair is old but the rest of me isn't. My mother-in-law told me I was letting myself go and that my husband wouldn't be happy (if he's with me because of my hair, we have bigger problems than anything hair dye can take care of!!). My daughters (ages 3 and 5) have asked me why I have grandma hair.

It's exhausting to keep reassuring myself that it's OK to be the me that I am. So thank you for being the reassurance when I don't have the energy to do it for myself.

And, by the way, I live in Redford. I'll keep my out for another silver fox when we're out and about in your neck of the woods :)

Lauren said...

Hi Tiffany!!!

Awww, Tiffany, my heart is going out to you so much right now. I just read your comment and I wish that I could send you all the support that you deserve. I'm so sorry that those around you are questioning gray hair and that some are being negative. You just keep following your heart and doing what is right for YOU! Your hair color isn't hurting anybody, and besides, once you grow your gray out completely, if you really hate it, or it if looks terrible (which it won't!) or if it was a deal breaker for your husband (which I doubt) then....at that point you could always make the decision to go back to dye.

(Wait! I'm sorry, I just re-read your comment....Have you completely grown your hair out? Now I see that it's been about two years.) Could your MIL's objection be due to the cut or something other than the gray and she is just using the gray as a reason?

I agree and UNDERSTAND 110% what you were saying about dye drying your hair out, being expensive and not wanting the chemicals. I get it! I hope your family comes around to support your very reasonable and important reasons! :)

Oh! And one last note....about your children and the kids in your class.... two nights ago my friend's 4-year-old daughter looked at a picture of me and said in the sweetest voice: "You look like an old Yady." (Lady) I just had to laugh. It stings a little, but I can understand why the kids are confused. It sounds like you do too. Know that you're not alone in this situation! ;)

I'll be looking out for a fellow Michigan silver sister. That's awesome Tiffany. Know that I'm thinking of you and sending a hug and love your way!
xoxoxoxooxoxoxox,
Lauren :)

Juliana tramontana said...

I have decided to go gray - sick of the dying and dull dry split ends, I told a guy who when he started to go gray he died it for a bit and then realised it made it look like a wig... I told another friend who dyes her hair and she told me I would look like a hag....so i decided to UNFRIEND her since I didn't need that kind of shallow projection. You don't need the opinions of shallow people hanging on to youth for dear life in every fake way possible, that can't see beyond the connotations of gray hair. I am only a few inches in and I am already excited, I saw the pics of you with dyed hair and what you look like now and can honestly say you look much more gorgeous now, gray is a nice colour, i wish i had your blue eyes but even with green/hazel eyes I can't wait to be completely gray and cut out the old dyed stuff. I am 41. there is something more striking about it... not many women have the guts to be themselves in that way, it's like botox and lips injections...they just aren't sexy deep down. Men don't raelly do it so why the hell should we?

Lauren said...

Hey Juliana!!!

Thanks for stopping by and for your comment. You are SO right! I hear what you are saying. It's just a hair color, right!? I am really sorry that you were met with some negative comments from your friend. We all need support, especially from those closest to us. I am happy though, to hear that you are already enjoying your new gray!!! I think it will look BEAUTIFUL with your green/hazel eyes. Absolutely! (Btw, green eyes are gorgeous.) I say more power to you Juliana, for having the bravery to be you! Hang in there and don't give up. One day everyone will see you and realize how great gray can be, just like all of the other colors of hair!
xoxoxox,
Lauren

Marta Montenegro Martin said...

I think you look 'ageless'. And beautiful! I've just began getting my first grays and will likely not color ... with good skin care and good nutrition, you face glows, you body is happy and your hair is your crowning glory - whatever color it may be. (part of the reason I don't want to color are the chemicals...) I think you look great!

Lauren said...

Hi Marta,

Thank you! I love your positivity and I couldn't agree more! I hope your fist silvers are as lovely and bright as I imagine. It's so nice that you can actually enjoy and celebrate the gray. That's so nice. Thank you for stopping by and for taking time to comment. It's very nice to meet you!
xoxox,
Lauren :)

Karen Freeman said...

Lauren, I so much enjoy your blog! Thanks for writing from the heart and inspiring all of us silver sisters out there!

Lauren said...

Hi there Karen!

Awww, your comment made my heart smile. THANK YOU! <3

I know I say this a lot, but I could not keep going along with all this gray hair stuff without the support and kindness from readers like you! We all help each other out.

Thank you for taking the time to leave a nice note. It made my day. :)
xoxoxo,
Lauren

Nicki said...

Hi lauren! Your article is so true! I come from two prematurely gray parents, so genetic ability to make brown hair was doomed from the start! I started going gray at 20 and am now probably 75% gray at 39. I have never colored my hair and let me tell you....it has been HARD sometimes! I have mostly embraced my gray ( as I am completmented all the time on it....more than my 60 year old co-worker who still colors her hair ash blonde). I take good care of my skin, so it appears youthful. I usually just assume people will look at my hair and think..."oh..she's prematurely gray". And then that one stupid person say " oh wow! You're just 39? I thought you were older because of your hair!" Now, I get that 1 negative comment and 99 positive and it's that one that makes you wander down the hair coloring aisle wondering if you should slip one of those boxes under your groceries! It is hard when all my 40 year old friends color their hair the same it was in high school. I look in the mirror and think maybe I would look 25 if I colored my hair. Then the practical (and cheap side) says " you don't want to color your hair! You'd eventually have to grow it out! What a mess! And you're already so gray you'd have a skunk stipe every 2 weeks. The money to cover your roots! Ridiculous!" And so, while I know I will probably always have these occasional battles with myself, in the long run, my gray hair wins the war. I remind myself I'm doing what is call "The Steve Martin". He was white in his 20's and now he is white in his 60's and because he never colored his hair he has the appearance of never having aged! I read that in a book. I think it's brilliant!

Lauren said...

Dear Nicki,

It is so nice to meet you!!!! Thank you for taking the time to write. I loved reading your story! Wow, can I just tell you how INCREDIBLY impressed I am, that you had the courage and thought to let your hair grow in naturally, especially since you were so young when your gray began. WOW! You are truly are a GIFT to the world! Few people are as fearless and authentic. I just love that Nicki! I love that you weren't afraid to be you!

You made a huge lightbulb go off in my head with your "Steve Martin" story. Yes! YES! Oh my gosh, that is completely true! I love it! If we're going to have gray, at least how great that it can help us look like we never aged. Awesome! :)

I'm so sorry that sometimes it is difficult and that you are tempted once in a while by the dye. I feel that too for sure. My friends, they also look just like they did in high school as well! BUT...having personally been through that "Skunk stripe" phase, both the roots every three weeks, and then the months on end of skunk stripe as I grew out my gray hair....yeah, you're right, it is such a pain to deal with. I can just imagine that your hair is gorgeous and so healthy without all the dye.

Life is great because we all get to make choices. No matter what you choose, I know it would be right for you! :) Thank you so so much again for sharing your story. You have completely inspired me!!!! <3 <3 <3

Great to meet you! Have a nice weekend!!!
xoxoxo,
Lauren

Letty said...

Lauren,
I just turned 52 and am about 2 months into letting my gray grow out. Reading your blogs and seeing how beautiful you look inspires me.

Thank you!
Letty

Lauren said...

Hi Letty!!!

It's very nice to meet you! I'm glad that I am able to help a bit. When I was two months in, and after that, I too looked to others for inspiration. I know this early part is not the easiest, but it all gets much easier. Promise!

Have a GREAT week!
xoxoxox, Lauren :)

Anonymous said...

Hi Lauren
I want to say a huge Thank You for sharing your experience of growing in the grey:)
Your blog was a huge help in making the decision to finally give my own tired colour it's marching orders, and not before time - I am 50 and have been colouring with henna, then home colour, for 35 years!

It was the texture of my coloured hair which bothered me most, and then an increasingly irritated scalp. I finally had one of those "epiphany" moments, when seeing a photo of myself with my daughters. The penny suddenly dropped that the colour itself was really unflattering and that it wasn't fooling anyone. I looked my age, and so did my hair, even dyed brown. But I know now that 50 year old hair can look gorgeous, there are so many pictures out there of people who rock their natural grey or silver or white. Having read your honest and inspiring blog, which I discovered on the wonderful site: Revoultion Gray, a cunning plan of how I would make the transition began to emerge. Your points about enlisting friends to offer support were also really relevant to me personally. I now have the full support of my family and best friend, and this has made all the difference. Initially they encouraged me to keep colouring, but this recently shifted when I was able to convince them of all the pros of growing out the colour.

Anyhow, back to the cunning plan. I opted to go short, thus shortening the process, so yesterday I took the plunge and had my shoulder length hair cropped (browny reddish with emerging badger stripe- we have badgers here in Scotland, not skunks) . The cut is great, as it took out most of the length at back, but is longer on top, and softer around face. I got home and all 3 of my kids were so lovely about it. They said that I look 10 years younger with short hair, and as there is so much less brown than there was, I can surmise from their reaction that a good cut is the key and is what folk notice most. I have decided to but myself a pair of funky earrings each month that I get through, as a reward to myself for shunning the dye. My ears are finally visible! I am also starting a piggy bank of £1 coins, to be emptied once the last brown is chopped off, and splurged on new colours for my silver fox wardrobe. Something else to look forward to! But mostly I am looking forward to seeing how it looks when all the silver can finally shine through. I will keep following your blog to keep me on track, but in the meantime, thank you so much Lauren, for all your advice and for sharing your journey. Your hair is gorgeous by the way! Jennie

Lauren said...

Jennie!!!!! :) :) :)

I'm bouncing around doing a big happy dance for you! Oh your comment just had me THRILLED for your new adventure! You sound so positive and brave and dedicated to seeing this out! A big "CONGRATS" on your new, adorable sounding short haircut. Isn't it nice to sometimes get the old ends cut off? A fresh start! I can just imagine your inner glow shining through as silvers.

I'm so happy that your plan is going accordingly, and that your new look was received with such enthusiasm. Hooray! I also love love love that you have treated yourself to a nice pair of dangly earrings, and your savings plan for SILVER FOX clothing.....that's fantastic!!!
(I have a spring/summer silver fox wardrobe post in the works btw way. It's all about color, and showing off your best assists!) See, this can be fun, right!? :)

Many hugs to you Jennie, and much thanks for your very lovely and kind comment. I am so glad that we can all help and encourage each other. It's wonderful. Have a GREAT day!
xoxoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Woven and Spun said...

Dear Lauren,
Thank you for writing about your journey. Personally, I think you are STUNNINGLY beautiful. Your grey hair is simply a crown to your beautiful eyes and face.
You have challenged me. I have to make a decision regarding my hair. I found my first grey hair at 21 but didn't colour for many years. I started colouring in my 30's. I'm 43 now and probably about 75% grey.
For years have said that I despise having to dye my hair and want to just go grey. My family and friends have always loudly opposed it, so I haven't felt 'free' to go for it. But, I am a big advocate for authenticity and your journey has inspired me to think more deeply about mine.
One concern for me is that I have olive skin, very dark hair, eyebrows and eyes and I don't see a lot of examples of grey with my skin tones that I like. So I need to explore my options.
Thank you for your honesty. You have inspired me to stop talking and start acting.
Many thanks,
Tiff

Lauren said...

Dear Tiff,

Hi! It's so nice to meet you! Thank you for leaving your comment, it really touched me and was so kind! Thank you.
Sometimes the biggest road blocks come not from us, but from those around us. I've found, at least in my experience, that many friends and and family who are against the gray, they just can't picture the end product. It's difficult to imagine how we'll look with a head full of gray hair. In the end though, it's been so much fun because some of my most vocal opponents now love the gray! It just takes time. Once you have everything grown out and looking nice, I think that most will come around. :)

I'm glad that this post could help a bit! I always say this but we really do inspire each other, including comments like yours, that inspire me! Thank you for reminding me about authenticity, and one of the reason that sparked my own gray hair journey.

Take care Tiff, great to meet you. Follow your heart!
xoxoxoxo,
Lauren :)

Anonymous said...

Hi again Lauren
I was just on your blog this evening to give myself a boost on my road to colour free hair. I posted here back on 9 April, and had just had my hair cut short. Your response was so positive and encouraging that it has propelled me through 6 weeks of shunning the dye. And the silver is sure shining through! I like to think its quite distinguished, mainly silver
around the temples and ears. My tip to share for all considering ditching the colour is: if you use permanent colour, try a transitional change first to semi permanent for a few months. I did this by accident really, mainly as semi is ( arguably) less harsh. The good news is that having not coloured for 2 months, instead of an obvious " badger" or "skunk" stripe in parting, which I'd have got with permanent, I just look a bit diluted on the top of my head. Kind of like I sat in a desert for a few days. At the mo I can live with it. But thinking headbands may be a good way to go, if I can get the hang of tying a scarf on without ending up looking like a (very mature) rag doll. The short cut was definitely a great way to start, for me or for anyone keen on a flying start to de- greying...for years my hair felt a bit like raffia in the shower. Now it is becoming much more smooth and healthy. A good feeling:) Have invested in hair oil too, and cornflower shampoo, which my daughter tells me tones down red pigments ( I was dyed reddish brown, and reddish tends to go a bit pinkish as it fades).
Anyhow, will sign off for now, thank you again so much Lauren for keeping these pages so fun and inspiring.
Jennie x

Lauren said...

Dear Jennie,

Ohhhhh, your comment just had me smiling from ear to ear! :)
It's so nice to hear from you. Thank you for your WONDERFUL sounding update. You've got this Jennie! You're doing it!

So many of the things you spoke of, the new joys of having "natural" hair, they all resonated with me. I am very glad that things have been going well and that you're doing ok! Better than ok it sounds!

Isn't it nice to have healthy hair once more? That was a main thing for me. I was so surprised how much softer and smooth my hair became too. It's great!

I LOVED your brilliant suggestion about semi-permanent hair dye. Gosh, I ever thought about it, but that does sounds like a nice way to "mute" the skunk strip. Thank you for sharing!

And, ah yes, the headband, the hair scarf...the hat...etc...etc.... When I was growing out my hair, I took that as a sign to buy some really pretty headbands and scarves that I wouldn't normally treat myself too. Bright, happy, new make-up too! Sometimes a girl just needs to pamper herself. It's really a great boost during this transition time. Be sure to have fun! :)

Well, thank you so much for your lovely comment Jennie. It made me so happy. I'm thrilled for you. Please keep up the great work!

xoxoxooxoxoxoxooxo,
Lauren

Letty said...

Hi Lauren,
Just wanted to thank you for your encouraging posts and pics for your gray. I turned 52 this year and decided it was time to stop coloring. Actually, I saw your picture and said " if she can do it so can I". You are beautiful! Thank You again.
Leticia

Lauren said...

Dear Leticia,

Woo Hoo! You can do it TOO!!!! :)
Hi! Thank you so much for such a sweet comment and for your kind words and encouragement. I'm so glad that the blog could help a little. If there's one thing I know, it's that YOU CAN DO IT!!!
Please hang in there. Sometimes the beginning of the grow out can be a bit bumpy, but really, it only gets easier and easier with time.
I'm sending you lots of cheer and encouragement and hopes for fabulous, healthy, shiny, sparkling silver hair to come!!! <3
Thank you again!
xoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Robyn said...

I want to say - you look beautiful with gray hair. I think (hope) that there is a movement starting among women who are tired of being told by society what is and what isn't attractive, and who are embracing their gray hair! I'm 44 and have had a lot of gray for a long time. Let me tell you, when I see a woman with gray hair, I see strength! Someone who can be her natural self- the way God made her, regardless of the opinions and comments from others (don't know why so many people have to tell me that I have gray hair, as though I don't own a mirror!!) We should think no more about a woman's hair color then we do her eye color! Thanks for a great article!

Lauren said...

Hi Robyn!

What a great comment! Thank you so much for taking the time to write and for your kind words. I agree with you. It's sad that a hair color can cause such a commotion. I think there is, at least in my opinion, and growing trend where women and choosing to grow out their gray. I see more and more "silver sisters" each day. It's exciting!
Thank you again. I'm glad that you're here!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Lauren,
I have just started growing out my grey, and just found your blog. Thank you for being so sweet, supportive, and motivational. I am so excited to get this thing done, and your posts are definitely going to help. I think you look amazing with grey hair - much more youthful, and definitely unique! Just wanted to say thanks.... :)
MELISA

Lauren said...

Hi Melisa!!!

Thank you so much for taking to the time to say "hello." I'm happy that the blog can be here to help!
First though, I'm sending you a hug!!! (>'-')>>>
I know how emotional growing out your gray hair can feel. I promise, it gets easier with each little 1/4 inch of growth, and soon, I think you will LOVER your new hair. Keep your eye on the prize, a beautiful new color, super healthy hair, no need for monthly root touch ups. There are many good things to come. :)
So nice to meet you Melisa and thank you for all of your kind words! Sending cheer your way. You can do this!!!!
xoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Mrs. Jorgenson said...

Your hair looks so great!! I'm 38 and have never dyed my hair but I was considering it. My husband likes it and doesn't mind the grey at all. THANK YOU for your blog. I think I've made my decision (for similar reasons as you) to stay natural and let the grey come!

Lauren said...

Hiya Mrs. Jorgenson!!! :)

I'm so excited for you. Making the decision is a big first step! And having a supportive husband, that is huge! You can do it!

I hope you love your new gray look. It's so nice to have that freedom from hair dye.

Thank you for all of your kind words and for taking the time to share your comment. I appreciate it greatly. <3

Lots of luck to you and cheer! \(^-^)/
xoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Amy Sue said...

Lauren, I am amazed - I saw your picture on Google after searching images about growing out gray hair. I seriously thought you must be in your twenties and just going gray early in life. You look amazing and very young - your gray hair looks so good with your skin tone. Boo to those who think it will only look good when you are young! I believe it has more to do with your attitude as well - if we feel good we look good. I was a strawberry blonde who started getting gray around 35 and began dying my hair. I stayed with my red/blonde but the red washed out so quickly that I quickly went blonde then four years ago went dark brown. I have really liked my dark hair but the grays are quickly winning. Now that I am almost 50 I am wanting to grow out my gray or at the very least add lots of highlights and medium color to make the gray growth not so noticeable. Then eventually I will let it all grow and I look forward to having more freedom from the beauty salon chair and more money in my pocketbook! You are so right when you say "it's only hair". We are so much more than that! Thanks for your awesome blog and words of encouragement!

Lauren said...

Hi Amy Sue!!!! \(^-^)/

Thank you! Thank you for all of the nice words you have and for your vote of confidence. :) I always worried that my gray would "age" me, but you know, you are totally right, it's all about our attitude! I try to be brave and confident. Well, I try, but it DOES get easier to face the world with your grays, which each month that passes.

I'm very excited for you and this new journey! No matter which way you start, just going for it, or with the lighter highlights to blend, Amy Sue, you'll be just fine. This is such a personal decision and you just have to take the path that works for uniquely you! :)

I can't tell you how nice that freedom is that you mention, from the salon chair or the box of hair dye, and the money saved.... it's great! Also, no hair dye makes for very healthy, shiny hair which is a great bonus! WOO HOO!

Thank you again for your lovely comment Amy. I appreciate it greatly. So much luck to you and a big hug too!!!!

xoxoxoxoxo,
Lauren :)

Anonymous said...

Hi there!

Recently, our company asked that we retake our badge photo ID's....last second without notification. I ran to the women's room to brush out my hair, cursing the gray roots I had not had the time to color. I took a deep breath and went in for the picture. After I had my new badge in hand I saw that, maybe, I would still look beautiful if I let the gray grow in. I have been coloring my hair since going gray at 17...I'm 41 now...I think it's time ;). I started dropping funny remarks at work about my hair and I'm blessed to say i have great coworkers who think it's a great idea. I have my family's support and my very best friend will be transitioning to gray along with me!

Gray and silver hair is on trend right now...lots of young women are coloring their hair gray everyday! I figure...I'm creative, young, fun...I can TOTALLY rock the gray! My one fear is that the workforce won't care for it. Has anyone encountered this problem?

Thank you for the amazing blog topics. Reading them has given me the courage to give it a shot. I'm sure I will keep coming back for great advice!

Thanks Lauren! You're a doll!

Lauren said...

Hiya new anonymous friend who took a new badge photo!!!! \('-')/

I absolutely LOVED your story!!!! Thanks for sharing and for your sweet comments on the blog.

You are amazing! That's fabulous that you looked at your new badge photo and could envision a NEW YOU! :)

I couldn't agree more, I think you'd do GREAT! Especially with all of the support it sounds like you have from co-workers and other friends around you. It's funny too, I definitely have people mention that they thought I dyed my hair gray on pour purpose. It's funny, but it's a trend! Lol.

I say "Go for it!!!" You can always go back to coloring if you don't like the gray. I bet you'll be like me though, wishing you'd done it sooner! :)

Thanks again for coming by!
xoxox,
Lauren

Julie B said...

http://julieberg.blogspot.com/2015/04/my-authentic-self.html

Ugh! I can't believe that women would say such things about you and your hair. I'm sorry.I am only 10 weeks out from my LAST color. I feel liberated..from myself, I guess! I have enjoyed reading your posts SO MUCH. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, your photos, your life, your grayness with us. You look absolutely fabulous! Look at the difference between the red hair photos, the darker hair photos and the gray. Gray is gorgeous!! Thank you so very very much. YOU will inspire me to never go back to color.

Lauren said...

Oh Julie, what a sweet, sweet comment. THANK YOU!!!!! <3 <3 <3 But....WOW!!!! Look at YOUR silvers!!! Oh they are just GORGEOUS!!!! :)

I know, sometimes people just have a hard time picturing your final look. They see our transition phase and think....Hmmmmm.......

I am super excited for your new journey. I think you are going to love it and all of the freedom that comes with leaving the dye behind! :)
So happy the blog could help a little. Thank you for stopping by to tell me.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,
Lauren

Cheryl WNC said...

I love your hair. I am in my 3rd month of no more coloring. I am excited about seeing my silver and my own nearly black hair again. I dislike the blond brown brassy color I have. And, I decided to heck with the naysayers. They can do as they please with their hair. I feel lighter just letting my hair be mine again. And, with the silver around my face, I think I look younger because the color is right and makes my eyes brighter. So, I am enjoying the transition in that respect. This other color is just ugh. I've enjoyed your site. It has helped so much.

Anonymous said...

I think you look beautiful and wish my grey would come through quicker now. I was just debating with myself if I should dye my hair after promising myself I wouldn't and I'm going to stick to my original plan. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Hi. I know it's been a while since you wrote this. I had my hair cut short this morning and have been feeling down about the grey showing. I started going grey at 20 and at 35 I'm 100% white. Your blog has cheered me up and made me think twice about dying it yet again. Thank you for reminding me that it's just another hair colour. My hairdresser even said people pay to have their hair dyed my colour :)

Aimee Ellis said...

I love the picture of you with your hair pinned back. You look super-young. I also love the other photos of you proudly displaying your gray hair. And I love this blog and will start following you. I only recently chose to go gray, and recently blogged about it. Here's my story. http://myhandisapen.blogspot.com/2015_09_01_archive.html Thank you for sharing yours and encouraging others!

Kelly Joyce Neff said...

Lauren, you are so beautiful! Your natural hair is beautiful. Your pretty face is beautiful. Your spirit is beautiful. Your courage and self-awareness are beautiful. You Rock!
It was rumoured in my mother's father's family that we 'went white early' (my grandad couldn't remember his mother being a redhead.) My naturally blonde mother always dyed her hair, to Kim Novak perfection. Being a coppery redhead, it was always my intention to 'fade to blonde' when 'the time came'. I hennaed my hair with a gloss once in a blue moon for fun. Then, in mid-30s, I noticed it was becoming sort of beige. Not what I had in mind. A long journey of learning about mixing and toning henna later, I cut off my hip-length hair to a pixie to donate - and discovered it was Definitely Beige with a lot of white. I found it depressing. I began with cassia and henna. Pouf! golden blonde. O-K! except roots. Except nobody liked my blonde. Except me.

Well, henna builds up as you know. Growing out my hair, I experimented with cassia, manic-panic toners, and gritting my teeth.

I am now 52 (there!) with a young-for-my-age face, but overly bright feels wrong for me, despite the fact that friends and some family think I 'should' have what they were used to when I was 20. (Why?) Now I am happily toning my long hair, watching it shift from tawny to sandy beige to platinum.

Your story is SUCH an encouragement! Your ideas for growing out are awesome. You are helping so many of us. You deserve awards, and not just blogging awards.
Bless you.

Lauren said...

Dear Kelly,

What a touching comment you took the time to write. THANK YOU!!! (>'-')>{Hugs!!}} Thank you so much. Your story sounds like quite a journey, but now you're almost there!!! :) I'm sure other silver sisters will find encouragement and inspiration form your comment too!!! Thank you from my heart and so happy for you.

xoxoxo,
Lauren

Dawns coffee shop chronicles said...

I'm doing it!

Anonymous said...

After going just one month of not coloring my medium blonde hair, a family member said, "Why are you DOING this to yourself!! You will look so old." Yikes. I have to admit it has shaken my resolve to see what is really under all this color. Your blog gave me encouragement to keep the faith. After all,if you don't like the result, you can just change it back. It is a long process requiring a lot of patience, though. A coworker said she gave me three months, and I will chicken out and start coloring again. It is odd to me that some people are not supportive and seem almost hostile toward the idea. Then there are others who say they wish they had the "nerve" to do it. I guess you just have to keep a sense of humor and pray for rapid growth!

Anonymous said...

You have a great blog with a lot of interesting and inspiring information. Thank you. Also, I think you look younger with your grey hair and older with your brown hair. Your skin looks luminescent and your eyes become really, really blue. This look really suits you. Lovely.